"All we need is a song to forget about it, What we need is a voice to set us free"

I haven’t updated in quite some time. I state the obvious.

I have, however, been keeping up with the blogs of my friends. And I genuinely enjoy reading each and everyone. It makes me so thankful for the people in my life. Reading your thoughts, seeing your creativity, it matters. At least to me it does. So much of who we really are, and who we would like to be, never fully gets translated sometimes. Not because we are inadequate at being our authentic selves, but because we become preoccupied with our own hectic lives that we cut ourselves, and our friends short. Yes, we might spend hours listening to one another, but how many times do you really talk to someone. Do you sit down and listen and recognize what isn’t being said. How many people have ever randomly turned to you and just asked you what your fears are? How many people have you asked?

I’ve noticed that the things we are constantly battling in our heads are sometimes the least spoken ones. This whole semester I’ve been asking people what they are afraid of, what their fears are. And whenever anyone answered me, regardless of what the answer was, they said it as though it was the biggest deal. Like if their fear were actually to happen it would physically break them in two. And I just wonder, if we would fear our fears so much if we realized how often others fear them too. Pretty much every person I talked to was absolutely petrified of failing. Petrified. Many admitted that living without a plan scares them shitless. Most are worried about being alone, or that they will never fall in love. That’s it. Those three. Well, the occasional spider, snake or heights would pop up, but for the most part, it was just these three.

So, more or less, we all fear the same fears. Yet, we never talk about it.

Stupid.

Because maybe if we did we would realize we will never end up truly alone because we all think alike. Maybe if we realized everyone has their own fears we would push aside our fear of failing, because it would dawn on us that the real reason we don’t want to fail is because of what others would think of us. They would still love you. Or they would be too busy with their own fears to care. And, even without scientific data, I can guarantee you every single person at some point in their life has had no plan. Has realized, I have no IDEA what I want to do with my life. I don’t really think any of us have it all planned out. Because it’s going to happen differently anyways. And I also think, after this semester that I’ve realized…

NO ONE has any FUCKING idea what he or she is really doing.

It’s called winging it while appearing to have your life together.

And we are all doing it, praying no one else realizes. Too bad we are all playing the same game. It’d be nice to have companions.

But when I read your blogs and see your updates the veneer of security vanishes and I have the opportunity to really understand how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking and what you wish would be. And I am overcome with thanks, because you are all even more amazing than you appear. You all have so much talent and authenticity that remains unseen.

You all matter to me. I love that for once I get to see your fears, because I can relate. I love that you want to share your interests with the world. I love that you have your own space to just dazzle and shine. Because that’s when I like you best. I’m not thanking you for being a friend. I’m thanking you for being you. Because every blog I visit is different. It is a reflection of you, not of who people think \ you are or perceive you to be, but an honest exposition of who you are and your absolutely superior intentions that usually remain hidden. I love that I get to secretly witness you figure out for yourself what everyone has been telling you for years. I love that you have an outlet, and I love that you let me peek into it.

An extremely good friend of mine (who should really continue blogging, because like HELL you don’t deserve one) and I came up with the 5c’s last year. Classy, confident, character, compassion and cruise control. The 5c’s every woman should practice everyday. And that is emulated in every single one of my friend’s blogs. Every single one.

I get the pleasure of taking a genuine look at your character, not your reputation. You are expressing you, thus you radiate confidence because you are not afraid to be you. Your cruise control, the way you live your life is exposed, and it becomes so clear the type of person you are and how you deal with problems and successes. You do it with class. In all of my friend’s blogs I see more compassion than I do vindictiveness. You are all classy, you write about ideas and experiences, never gossiping or talking ill about people. You all show an enormous amount of compassion, because the way you write about your lives proves you just want someone to understand and care, so that you can do the same in return.

You are all just amazing. That’s really what I’m rambling about. I love the unique person that you are. And I’m not even just talking about my friends with blogs, but those without. Because I know if you did, I would feel the same way. You know who you are. And you don’t compare yourself. You are amazing at being you. And I thank you for that, because your confidence and your personality add so much zest and sparkle to my own life.

I wish people blogged instead of facebooked. Maybe then we’d actually understand each other a little better. And maybe people would realize that it is the quality not the quantity of your friends that matter.

You are beautiful and you are loved. You have nothing to fear. You matter to me. And yes I’m talking to YOU. Just thought you should know, because I don’t think I say it enough. And I think you all deserve to hear it more often.

Fa La La

Just a little something...

Once again, this is an excuse of a post, but just thought I'd update with something. One of

my favorite movies, His Girl Friday.

"I said I won't slow down until the stars they fade, Runnin' these streets where lives are made"

I'm a horrendous blogger. I suck. I profusely apologize. I'm also a very busy little girl. I do however promise to upload my stockpiled "blog-approved" writing over Thanksgiving break. I just want to point out that I write. I write a lot. I actually write pretty much everyday. I'm upset that my blog doesn't reflect that. I wish this were an actual post so I could start remedying that. I'm not ashamed however, of "reblogging" these pictures from tumblr. I feel they do a stellar job illustrating my current mood. I'd still rather this post was 9,000 words than 9 pictures. I understand I'm not perfect though. I'm completely, utterly and happily OK with that. I feel awful if you came here looking for an actual post. I hope you like pictures, because that's all I have to offer. I find myself suddenly coveting a pair of polka-dot tights. I wonder why...

It’s pathetic I haven’t updated. I know. And this post is a lazy one, I’m too busy to come up with my own words, so I thought I would just share with you those of others.

Madonna is amazing. She’s one of my idols, not for her music or style, but for her mantras and mindset. I think she proves that you can be yourself and still be taken seriously and beloved. She’s a badass and she does what she pleases. And guess what? It works really, really, really well for her. Conformity is boring, but for the most part I would say it will get you where you want to go in life and you will face little resistance. But I think if you do as you truly want, you’ll get farther than you ever thought possible. Hell it works for Madonna. I think if every woman had her mentality there would be a lot more successes and less insecurities. The first quote has been one of my favorites since middle school.

"I'm tough, ambitious and know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, then OK."

"To be brave is to love someone unconditionally, without expecting anything in return. To just give in. That takes courage; because we don't want to fall on our faces or leave ourselves open to hurt."

"A lot of people are afraid to say what they want. That's why they don't get what they want."

"I have the same goal I've had ever since I was a girl. I want to rule the world."

"Sometimes you have to be a bitch to get things done."

"To me, the whole process of being a brush stroke in someone else's painting is a little difficult."

"I stand for freedom of expression, doing what you believe in, and going after your dreams."

"When I'm hungry, I eat. When I'm thirsty, I drink. When I feel like saying something, I say it."

"That we are responsible for our own fate, we reap what we sow, we get what we give, we pull in what we put out. I know these things for sure."

"I am my own experiment. I am my own work of art."

"Because I've taken off my clothes don't mean that I've revealed every inch of my soul."

"I hate polite conversation. I hate it when people stand around and go, "Hi, how are you?" I hate words that don't have any reason or meaning. Also I hate it when people smoke in elevators and closed places. It's just so rude."

"You have to be patient. I'm not."

"I'm not a feminist, I'm a humanist."

"I don't care anymore if people dress like me, now I want them to think like me."

"I think passive beauties have their place in the world. It's hard for me to relate to that."

John Mayer is a jerk. But he's a brilliant guitarist and an amazing song-writer. He's one of those musicians that pays attention to details, whose lyrics actually tell a story in addition to creating a great song. And for all of the obnoxious comments he's made in the media, he has actually said some pretty insightful things. In fact it is this first quote that sparked this whole post. I found it saved somewhere in the files of my computer. He says this so perfectly. Through a metaphor about crayons. Genius.

"Life is like a box of crayons. Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you're really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I've got a few missing. It's ok though, because I've got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet the 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem? I mean there are so many different colors of life, of feeling, of articulation.. so when I meet someone who's an 8-color type.. I'm like, "hey girl, magenta!" and she's like, "oh, you mean purple!" and she goes off on her purple thing, and I'm like, "no - I want magenta!"

"I'd like to think the best of me was still hiding up in my sleeve. "

"Sometimes I wish that I was the weather, you'd bring me up in conversation forever. And when it rained, I'd be the talk of the day."

So what, so I've got a smile on. But it's hiding the superstitions in my head."

"I can't wait to figure out what is wrong with me, so I can say this is the way I used to be."

"Even if you think the flame has died, there's at least one lyric that'll hit that last hot spot, and then you'll find yourself as fucked as you were the day you lied and said you never wanted to see her again."

"I'm having the time of my life figuring out this next move."

"Tweet, Tweet, Twitter, Twitter."

I realize I have failed miserably at my challenge, however I have been busy increasing my social media consumption, which is essential to my day-to-day existence and apparently my chances at you know, a future career. Go figure.

Technology irritates me. It consumes everyone’s lives to the point where most people are incapable of writing a thank-you note or holding an actual face-to-face conversation without sounding like a bumbling idiot. Therefore, for the most part, I use social media sparingly, naturally believing it to be sadistic. And then I crossed to the dark side and got a twitter. (Follow me, just because I’m fabulous).

I previously deemed twitter to be absurd. Let’s offer another means for the public to express their every pointless, annoying thought, such as “Ate celery and peanut butter for lunch today. Yum.” EVERYONE is just so utterly fascinating they MUST deserve a place to share their genius. Mm. So I proudly boycotted this waste of Internet space. That is until a panel of strategic communications professionals informed me that without a twitter I’m basically wasting my time, and I could kiss my chance at snagging a good internship and job buh-bye. I sat there and continued to listen with resistance to the absurd notion that without being a social media-crazed loon, I couldn’t succeed in Strat. Comm. Yet, in the back of my mind I couldn’t ignore the tiny voice that was screaming, “Make a twitter. Achieve world domination.”

Naturally I caved. And naturally I now love twitter.

I love it, because it made me re-evaluate my use of all my social media. I’ve realized that if I manipulate twitter and facebook and blogging instead of being a helpless addicted victim, I can land myself an internship and hopefully a job, instead of wasted hours spent creeping through photos of a toga party.

Twitter has basically changed my life. Not really, but really. It’s making me a better writer, which is pretty life altering in my mind. Twitter: What an amazing concept, allow people to post their every thought, as long as that thought is under 140 CHARACTERS. Most people cannot make a point in 1400 characters. It is a challenge which is making me incredibly selective about the vocabulary I use and is probably the ONLY tool that has ever FORCED me to be concise in my writing. I don’t have a choice, I exceed the limit and I lose all publishing ability. It’s frustrating. And so simply BRILLANT. And, as crazy as it is, it’s demanding me to be witty and intelligent in basically one sentence. If all of my sentences were witty and intelligent in their own right, can you imagine what an entire blog post would sound like (much better than this I can assure you. It’s only been a two-week twitter relationship so far; expect improvement).

I’m embracing, not scorning this overload of social media. I’m accepting the advancements in technology and am determined to manipulate them in my favor. My roommate, Paige, thinks I’ve gone twitter crazy. And perhaps I have, but maybe I have to be, maybe I have to be an efficiendo of social media so I can tailor it to my needs without letting it consume my life. Basically, I love twitter. I love its successful attempt to end my writing rambling, I love how it assists me in staying up-to date with world events and I love how I can follow Kim Kardashian’s thoughts and emotions as she endured a stressful 13 minutes stuck in an elevator.

Happy Friday and happy tweeting. Follow me if you already aren’t; naturally my tweets are life altering.

http://twitter.com/alexandriarose7

Don’t have a twitter? Following my every thought should be enough of an incentive to start. You can thank and attribute your future life success to me later. Preferably via a tweet.

"Don't want to discuss it, I think it's time for a change. You may get disgusted, and start thinking I'm strange..."

How would you like to present yourself this upcoming fall season? As a chic, well-dressed, women who values individuality and style, or a bum who conforms? And that conformity is defined by sporting an unattractive, uncalled for, and completely unnecessary trend. No surprise, I'd pick the Madewell lookbook over Nike Tempos ANYDAY.

I am asking something of every female here at Mizzou, and I guess the world over. Respect yourself; stop wearing track shorts. Just stop. I cannot even fathom where this trend came from (not the chic East Coast I can guarantee you that), but it needs to be eradicated immediately. People have been dulled into this delusion that it’s appropriate and acceptable to wear attire that doesn’t pertain to your lifestyle.

Track shorts are for people who run track. While they’re running. Not while attending class or eating lunch. Honestly, the shorts are pretty cute as far as workout clothes go. I’ll admit it, I have two pairs, but I wear them to the gym. They’re workout clothes, unless you’re working out (at that exact moment), why are they on your body? And for about 78.24% of the population, they make your butt look really, really unattractive. Might I also add it seems really ironic that those who wear them almost everyday clearly don’t appear to even know where the Rec is located.

I understand that some people have very packed, full-schedule days and the Rec is one of a multitude of things they have to do that day. So, if you get up in the morning and have two classes and then plan on working out, it does make some sense to wear them to class to save time. If you already worked out I would hope you would have the decency to change. And shower. However, I highly doubt the TWENTY-SEVEN girls I saw wearing them from my short trek from Lowry Mall to Gannett Hall were all planning on working out later. Plus, I guess it’s the new “thing” to not only wear track shorts at inappropriate times of the day, but to also make sure they don’t match anything else you’re wearing.

I get it, it’s college, and it would be SO CHALLENGING to actually dress yourself in the morning. But consider this practice for, you know, real life. It’s fabulous you have 13 pairs of track shorts all in different colors. Yet when you get your first job and realize you cannot wear track shorts to work and look like a bum, what will you do? Your wardrobe will lack any seemingly professional clothing because you spent all your money building up your collection of non-workout-workout clothes.

As I mentioned previously, these shorts aren’t even flattering. Well, maybe if you’re a size 4 or smaller, but in that case you most definitely should be wearing cuter clothes to show of your figure. Stop being lazy. Grow up and get dressed for life. I cannot wait to behold the horror that will result when the colder weather comes and girls cannot wear track shorts everyday, will we see a god-awful combination of leggings with track shorts? Shudder.

I understand that many people are susceptible to peer pressure and ridiculous trends, but just because other girls don’t have an ounce of style does not mean you need to succumb to unattractive, random outfit choices. If everyone else is jumping off the bridge, guess what…stay on it. And you sure as hell aren’t wearing track shorts.

Oh and here's a little FUN FACT. These "new" Nike track shorts have been on the market for around for fifteen years. Same style, nothing new or special about them. FIFTEEN YEARS. And then all of a sudden every girl who can't dress uses them as her excuse to pretend she has style. Just goes to show you how people get caught up in "trends." Run away from these shorts, there nothing more than a sickening phenomenon.

“I miss New York. I still love how people talk to you on the street - just assault you and tell you what they think of your jacket.”

-Madonna

Just thought I'd share...

Stop. You're scaring young children. And me. And raccoons are not looking for a spokeswoman.

"Leave all your love and your longing behind. You can't carry it with you if you want to survive. The dog days are over, the dog days are done..."

I know it's really cliche and typical for me to be quoting a song that plays on the commercial for "Eat, Pray, Love" but I can't help it. I'm absolutely obsessed with it and I thought Florence & The Machine's performance at the VMA's was fabulous. Just like her voice, the song is distinct, yet so simple and it always puts me in a better mood without fail. Call me run-of-the mill or a victim of popular pop, but I'll be the first to happily admit it's one of my absolute favorite songs Because the dog days really are over for me.

I’m feeling my inner hippie coming out. I’ve just been in a really good mood, maybe because I’ve finally realized that being happy is independent of your current situation, and is really a conscious choice that you can make everyday regardless of you’re actual circumstances. I feel in control… because I’m letting so much go. I have to continue to chose to be happy, otherwise I never will be—after all I have too high of expectations (as I think most everyone does), absolutely everything would need to go perfectly, positively and always in my favor in order to make me happy. And that is inconceivable, but I can choose to be happy. I can remember that it’s my choice how I want to view the world and how I want the people in it to view me.

And OK, yes I did have a good week this past week, but honestly I am realizing the my “flying free” mantra is probably responsible for my constant state of serenity. Sure I’ve gotten extremely frustrated with outside factors, but overall I’m quite pleased with myself at the moment. I genuinely believe I’ve adopted the entire “mind over matter” concept and its been embedded into my psyche. And that seems to be making me a lot stronger than those around me. I understand that college is stressful, believe me, but at the same time, it isn’t the end of the world. Putting things into perspective is such a nifty tool! Did I forget to take an online geology quiz two weeks ago? Yes. Did I want to hit myself for forgetting? Absolutely. Did I want to scream when I saw a zero out of twenty? Uh-huh. Am I beyond pissed because I knew this information like I know my own birth date and social security number? YES. Is there anything I can do about this? NOPE. And you know what? Life goes on. I have to focus my energy in such a variety of places that I no longer have the time (or rather choose to have the time) to dwell on the negative. I just move on.

It’s frustrating to be surrounded by so many people who can’t put their lives into perspective. Everything trivial becomes the biggest deal, and everyone else needs to know the saga that is his or her life. I’m truly sorry if you’re having a bad day, or week, or month and I’m extremely empathetic, but don’t be surprised if my mood doesn’t drop in sync with yours. Misery loves company, but I hate misery. So I apology if I’m still smiling and pleased with my life when you feel like yours is falling to bits and pieces. It isn’t an insult or anything of that sort. I just feel like I have so much going for me, why should I waste my time being anything but happy? I’m 19. I’m fortunate enough to be attending a University, I’m a part of the Greek system and I don’t need for anything. Why wouldn’t I be perpetually happy? Instead of searching for something to make me happy, why don’t I just appreciate all that I’ve already been blessed with?

And I do. This past week, actually this past month, has been living proof that I’m the one creating my happiness. When I choose to have a good attitude, everything else seems to shine a bit brighter. Sure, I will no doubt encounter days when I am anything but happy, and I’m allowed, but for the most part I’m retaining my happiness regardless of what life throws at me. And I’m completely over feeling guilty for enjoying my life. Lately I feel like I’m being punished for being happy, and that’s ludicrous. If others want to choose to focus on the negative and depressing possibilities of the future, well then fine. But don’t take it out on me.

I feel very content and focused; even as I wonder everyday “What the hell am I doing here?” “What am I going to do with my life” and “What’s the point?” Simply because I’ve chosen to banish any limiting thoughts and feelings, I’ve been propelled into happiness and I’ve been flying. And the view from up here is too good to ever give up.

“We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.”

“If you find serenity and happiness, people may be jealous - Be happy anyway.” Mother Teresa.

“Stop seeking in vain to arrange circumstances that will make you happy. Simply choose to be happy, and your circumstances start to line up around that happiness.”

“Your happiness is your choice. Choose it any time you wish.”

Fa La La

“Develop an interest in life as you see it; the people, things, literature, music - the world is so rich, simply throbbing with rich treasures, beautiful souls and interesting people. Forget yourself.”

"Hey, she's a piratey soul full a' vinegar and glitter. She is a song of her own from down the wrong end of the river. Wild, like the lily-a-passion."

Thanks to a fabulous sorority sister and my inexcusable negligence of this blog, I am creating a two-week challenge for myself. My lovely sister is challenging herself to dress up and look presentable for class everyday and that inspired me to write something, anything, once a day for the next 14 days. I claim to never have anytime to blog, but I know that is only a lame excuse. In fact, these next two weeks promise to be some of the most hectic I’ve confronted in college thus far, so I’m purposely doing this challenge during them, to prove that I can not only efficient my time between school and my obligations but with writing as well. Even if it is only a quick little blurb, a montage of my favorite magazine ads or something as simple as a quote, I need to make a post everyday. No excuses. I have to make the time, because if I can’t even manage to write for pleasure as a little college student, how the hell do I plan on making this my career? This really shouldn’t even be all that difficult, I love to write, I enjoy blogging, I just need the motivation to make myself sit down and do it. I suppose I found it. (And for the record this declaration completely qualifies as blog post 1 of 14).

Gotcha! Of course I will be oh-so-sweet as to deliver a post that has a bit more substance in it then the promise to write something of interest in the future.

If you know me well (or even if you don’t—this is something you will probably pick up on quickly) you know I have an obscene obsession with the show Gilmore Girls. I cannot even begin to express my love and devotion for that mother-daughter team so full of wit, humor, and knowledge of pop culture. As much as I love the show and think both Lauren Graham and Alexis Bledel are gorgeous, I will admit Rory Gilmore’s wardrobe left much to be desired. Frumpy sweaters and mom jeans made me want to die a little every time I had to watch Rory do something slightly awkward on screen, because her outfit choice moved her form the ‘slightly awkward stage’ to the ‘she’s quite bizarre stage.’ Rory, I love you, your intelligence, your love of the written word and your ambition, but the fugly outfits have got to go. The end of the season brought much improvement and relief, but as her outfits got better her intelligence seemed to wane, which I find quite insulting.

Luckily, the real-life Alexis seems to have really grown up in the past few years since the end of Gilmore Girls. Yes, she has always been strikingly beautiful with her flawless complexion and bright, beautiful eyes, but now she’s on the cusp of well-dressed woman, and I couldn’t be more pleased. Just in the past week along she has nailed every outfit. She’s proving she has style (or a stylist) and she isn’t just wearing the clothes, she truly looks more graceful and put together. She looks fabulous I can’t even pick a favorite outfit—except I can. The black pencil skirt and chic top wins out, although she looks strikingly sophisticated in the blue J. Mendel dress and she reminds me of a grown-up Madeline in the eye-popping red little dress. I love that one of my favorite actresses is becoming one of my favorite “best-dressed” icons. And I actually like the hair color change, it’s fresh and different, nice change but nothing drastic.

Happy Tuesday!